KougaijiCHAN?
by Warfang
Summary: When Kou-kun's step-mother decides to finally get rid of him, he turns into an amnesiac girl. When the Sanzo-ikkou finds him, how will they fix the problem? Will they even bother?
1. Chapter 1

Kougaiji-CHAN

Kougaiji-CHAN!?

Chapter One

For once, they were making good time. The beach they were driving along was a nice change of scenery, and the town assured them after the storm last night, there may be a few trees down, and it would be faster for them to travel this way. Hakkai hadn't pressed the issue; there were plenty of people here to fix the problems on their own. Plus, he and Sanzo had been edgy, the monk catching up on sleep as he sat there in the front seat. Goku and Gojyo had decided that arguing over why the ocean was blue was the best way to spend the time since they arrived at the town. Hakkai figured they had finally reached a new level of being stubborn if they were still on the same subject.

"Aunty! Uncle! Look what I found!" Another thing about the beach….

"Jeep, transform!" Sanzo was not going to appreciate waking up like this. The poor girl who had ran in front of them from one of the few sand castles was know firmly wedged between the sand and one blond monk.

"Aaaah! K-chan, are you okay?" Hakkai decided that missing one good night of sleep should not be making him see one towel wrapped around her waist with a (conservative) bikini topped form of Yaone. Or…

"Ow! Seeing me brother in swimming trunks is not my idea of a good start to the day. Shit," Gojyo mumbled.

"Speak for yourself." Came Goku's reply. "I think Sanzo is chest deep in a female version of Kougaiji. Wait, wha-"

The tree of them stared. Sure enough, flat on her back, hand clutching a conch shell as she stared with lilac eyes at the blond hair that had to be connected to a body because she was pinned, with maroon hair pulled into a ponytail was a defiantly female prince(ss) of demons.

Sanzo does not enjoy burying his face into pillows, because one, they were soft, and two, they were suffocating, and three, it usually meant his backside was not protected. So why had the world stopped and felt soft? Lifting up his head, Sanzo decided screaming was not a good course of action.

Instead, "…Morning. What happened?" Pulling himself up, Sanzo helped the –this is so wrong- woman to her feet, and passed her to replicas of his –her- aides. Turning, he stared down at the group still sitting.

"Well?"

Hakkai was first up. "The poor girl didn't see us, and she ran from that sand castle," he pointed to the one two feet ahead, "right in front of us, and I immediately choice the safest course of action."

"Yeah, and you got to check if she was okay or not," was all Gojyo drawled, when Sanzo took a very threatening step forward, hand reaching for his waist, an obvious just-because-people-are-here-does-not-mean-I-will-hesitate-to-shoot-you look on his face.

"Er, don't they look a lot like the Kougaiji-taichi, minus Lirin?" was Goku's next question to break the silence.

Turning around, Sanzo muttered a distinct "Idiots." to them. He bowed to the three demons. Odd, this near the village, morning, and no one else here…maybe the storm last night knocked down a few trees and everyone was in the forest. In which, all the more privacy, and no lewd rumors about him. "I am sorry for scaring you. We did not have a proper lookout for where we were going, and I must say, that may be entirely my fault, as I was asleep."

"Oh, no Monk-san. I was so excited about finding one of those conches Uncle Doku keeps telling me about that I forgot to watch where I was going." The girl looked up from her bow. "Oh, no. Forgive me, Sanzo-sama."

Sanzo looked up to Yaone and Dokugakuji. Both made the slightest shake of their heads. "Well, I insist that the problem was my fault," like hell it was "and would you go with my friends and your Uncle and buy yourself a treat with this money as my form of an apology?" There. That got rid of trouble two and three, source of problem, source of problem that he-she trusted, and one person to watch over the proceedings. And left him to talk to someone who may have an idea of what was going on. They could leave Kougaiji in this form, speed up even faster with no hindrance to their travel, but Sanzo had a sneaky feeling that Kougaiji would try to help them if the situation was reversed. Well, at least now he had an outside that matched his heart….shit.

"A crazy experiment and I hope your memory is intact."

Yaone smiled at him, watching the others buy ice cream at a just opened stand up where the grass was.

"All I can remember is that we had to get her out of there, and that Lirin said she would split up and find a way back to us. Everything else was fuzzy, but,' Yaone blushed "I had been keeping a journal, so once I broke the code, bits and pieces started floating through my head. All I know is that there must be a way to save Lord Kougaiji from completely disappearing into K-chan."

"Hmmm." He was going to need a new pack of Marlboro reds after this mess was resolved.

A/N: Eheh, heh. My muse is threatening me with writers block if I don't stop starting new stories and finish the old ones, so I put out two new chapters and then put this one up. Now she is muttering about loopholes. So, how was the writing style? Good? Bad? Choppy? Smooth? I need reviews that will answer these questions. Please leave replies in the purple box. You know you want to critique.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer- I do not own Saiyuki.

Make that two packs of Marlboro reds. K-chan, as now everyone seemed to be calling him –her- was like a negative photo of Kougaiji. She was bright, loud, very apologetic, and seemed to blatantly follow him around, asking after his well being. She was, in a word, annoying. Maybe even more annoying than Goku, but one, she did not complain for food, and two, he couldn't smack her with his fan.

He probably could, but what about the image of the Sanzo priest people projected onto him? They'd assume the girl a kind of demon –oh, wait, she –he- was- and treat her badly, on the basis that a priest saw fit to hit _him_ with a harisan.

"Alright." Sanzo glanced at the others. Dragging Kougaiji (he refused to call _him_ anything else) a I'm-certain-this-is-okay Yaone, and Dokugakuji, who was naturally suspicious, to the next town on the coast and renting two rooms with an adjoining door had seem like the next best step. The three of them were locked in a room (they all wound up walking) and now Sanzo had to explain his plan.

"I know they're the enemy, but that is just pathetic. I suspect the scientists did a slight genetic hiccup, and a spell created something of the polar-opposite in Kougaiji's mental state. I am also thinking-"

"Look out the world's gonna end. Sanzo has to hold more than one notion inside his head." Sanzo glared at Gojyo.

Goku piped up. "Isn't notion a rather big word in your vocabulary?"

Both were smacked with a handy piece of folded paper. Sanzo continued, slightly interrupted.

"Call him Kougaiji, and he pulls more back to himself. Call him K-chan, and he slips more into the spell. My guess is-"

"That sh- **he **follows you around because he feels, safer?" Now it was Hakkai interrupting him. At least Hakkai was engaging in the existing conversation, and not distracting from it.

"Not just safer. More that he feels like he is slipping to his original format. Yaone, Dokugakuji and Lirin must have disrupted the process early enough that the transition form one person to another must feel…rough to him, and he would rather go back, than forwards."

"So, you're saying we should tip the change back to being Kougaiji instead of K-chan, by surrounding him with things that would be familiar?"

"Yes, Goku."

"Then what about a-"

"Hold on. Why are those two acting on the basis of K-chan if they want to save Kougaiji?"

"Most likely, Gojyo, they did not merely escape Houtou Castle. I suspect a light compelling spell, coupled with their amnesia, makes it easy for them to slip up, and unknowingly hurt their lord." Hakkai smiled over to Sanzo.

"Is that what you suspect as well?"

"Yes. Now, you take Yaone, you deal with your brother, and Goku and I will do what he suggested."

"What!? The monkey never finished talking!"

"It is quite clear that a spar between those two will be a faster way to ground Kougaiji."

"Then what are you going along for?" No implications this time, but Hakkai sent Gojyo a freezing smile anyway.

"To help him pick a fight." With that, Sanzo stood up and left, going out into the hallway. Voices, and then he walked back past their open door, with a braid of maroon hair proving a shorter Kougaiji accompanied him. Goku waited till they were at the steps, then jumped up and sprinted after them. The remaining two looked at each other, than at the adjoining door.

Curing Kougaiji was under way, how did they deal with amnesiac opponents who 'heal' by being surrounded by something familiar?

"Ah!" Hakkai straightened up. "I'm going to take Ms. Yaone to the herbalists. You try bars with your brother, or a soldier's barrack."

"Where would I find either here?"

"Your problem now, you heard Sanzo. Later." Hakkai stood up and left, also using the hallway door to request that they go shopping. Gojyo heard a questioning tone, deflected by an "Oh, no. Gojyo would like to see you again. I'm only taking Ms. Yaone so that we will be out of the way, and get work done. He's still in the room, thinking about what would be the best place for a reunion." A door slammed, and then his brother came in and shut the door behind him.

"I never really thought you would consider where you were talking, as much as to whom you were speaking to."

He sat down, across the table.

"So, what have you been up to?"

All three groups shared one idea. "This is too weird."

A/N: Typed up on the 6th. Probably will set aside and proofread later. I have a few ideas to work into the story, but I see it wrapping up in a few more chapters. And what is the name of that folded paper fan used to hit people with? I _think _I have it right.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer- I do not own Saiyuki, and barely have enough time to get the computer as it is.

Walking through the market had landed them near a forest. Sanzo and Kougaiji were strolling along, with Sanzo making a few queries as to if Kougaiji could see the butterfly over there, or make a few general statements about the butterfly in relation to itself, the universe, and its purpose. The answers allowed him to discern that the only ailments where slight amnesia and gender confusion.

_Dear Heavens, why did I set my mind to his task?_

Kougaiji whirled around and started screaming at a bush about being a stalker.

_Especially since it is to help him?_

The innocent bush let Goku storm into the clearing and grab Sanzo, dragging the priest who was doing a 'what-got-into-you-face' along the river bank, away from Kougaiji. Said black tank top and jeans girl was staring at them, before she started shaking.

"Why are you acting like this, Goku? Aunt Yaone said you wanted to help me."

"Yeah, sure, I just don't like the fact that we fight each other because we hafta, and now you're stealing away Sanzo."

"……"

"Wha?! I'm not stealing him! He's nice to me!"

"Well, he shouldn't be. The two of you fight like cats and dogs."

"…Is that all?"

"Huh?" Both turned to Sanzo.

"The two of you enjoy fighting so much you're picking a fight over me. That is lame."

"Well, what other reason is there?" Goku whined, before his stomach loudly suggested an idea.

"Loser pays for lunch?" Kougaiji called, settling into a fighting stance.

"Don't think I'll go easy 'cause you turned into a girl."

The ensuing fight ended with Sanzo getting wet when Goku knocked Kougaiji into him.

"Uh oh."

"Whoops."

A dripping wet Sanzo emerged from the lazy river and toward above the two shorter demons. Although both were over five hundred years old, each in a way still were just children. And yet, they also proved to be more mature than most people Sanzo met.

"We are going back; I'm getting new clothes on, and paying for lunch."

"Why! I was the one who was losing!" Kougaiji glared at Sanzo.

"Well, you certainly have kept your honor intact. Besides, what would you pay with?"

Angry silence met him. Kougaiji never backed down, and (s)he certainly was going to keep his (her) end of the deal.

"Look, I didn't say this, but you and Goku not only go looking for fights, you usually fight each other. I was hoping that the shock of something familiar to you would shock you back……but taking you with us to Houtou Castle is not a good idea."

"Maybe something else will happen so we can go back to fighting and you can save your Mom."

"I….have a mother?"

_Great._

* * *

Shopping with Yaone was interesting. So far Hakkai had learned how to treat pick pockets to snacks, tell the difference between herbs that will last for ages from proper storage, and taking eyes off of Yaone to see where Jeep went ends with something being blown up. Like the over-bearing demon that just flew by trailing smoke.

Hakkai sighed, and shifted his purchases. "We should head back and see how the others are doing."

"Okay, Hakkai-san. I do believe most of my memories are intact, but please, let's not fight until Kougaiji is cured. We most likely may end up joining your cause if Lirin-sama does not appear soon."

Hakkai mused over the pros and cons, and without money being a problem-"But Kougaiji wants to save his mother."

"Oh. That can be achieved with us allying to you. Rescuing the leader of the demons would handle the void of leadership when Lady Gyokumen Koushu dies. Lord Kougaiji is more than adequate, but having someone familiar would make it easier."

Hakkai had to wonder how Sanzo would deal with helping Kougaiji revert to himself escalating into save the demon empress, stop the minus wave, and kill the ox king.

* * *

"I'm not sorry for how this turned out."

"Hrm?"

Gojyo fixed his brother with a look.

"I'm proud of you, just a little torn that we can't be on the same side."

"I'd go ballistic if we had to team up to 'cure' Kougaiji. Putting up with the others is hard enough, like a ….never mind."

"You were going to say 'family'. And that's okay. Just reserve the position of older brother for me, alright?"

Hitting the downstairs bar for some drinks had been a good idea, and just talking with his brother had opened up a truck load of skeletons in the closets. Still, his brother had given Gojyo a basic understanding of what happened to Kougaiji.

"We're back, and we're hungry!"

Speak of the devil…. (No pun intended)

"We'll be downstairs in a minute. Dokugaku remembered something vital; I'll tell ya'll when you can focus on me."

"Sanzo, let's go get tables. We'll need seats for seven."

"Eight if my little sister shows up."

A/N: Sorry it's been so long! One thing piled on top of another, and I originally intended this to be just a few chapters, but now I'm thinking of a whole new plot. At least they can be incorporated.

Review.


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